#30daychallenge Check out the Original Post with all the details for the challenge here.
Letter: Write a letter to your crush…
Ah, where do I start? I’ve crushed a lot over my lifetime, but I think you have been that long lasting one that I just can’t seem to get over. You make the butterflies in my stomach turn when I come across a picture or when you come up in a conversation. Only one of my friends know I like you, but even she doesn’t know how much. I’ve been a “fan” of yours since our sophomore year in college when we first met. I hated that I lost your number. I spent so much time at your school with my friends that, you always crossed my mind when I ventured over to Morehouse. Now with the easy access to people because of the internet, I get to somewhat keep up with you via my computer. I don’t internet stalk you but I love it when you come across the screen when I’m not even thinking about you. I tend to think in most cases that crushes are just that crushes, and in most cases probably should remain that way. I mean there is a reason why you never told that person. But there is something about you that leads me to think about what ifs. You are a great person and the man that you have become is even greater. You’ve followed your dreams and have stayed true to your self. You’re awesome on the eyes and a pleasure to be around. Maybe one day I will lead you here so you can read this for your self. Until then I will continue to watch you from a far (but not in a crazy stalker type of way ;-P), maybe one day when I find love you will become a distant thought, or when you find love. But, until then I will continue to smile when I come across something about you! Keep following your dreams. Maybe one day when our paths cross I won’t be so shy and reserved, and I get that chance to tell you truly how you make me feel.
Picture: What I Wore…
Since I don’t ever really go anywhere but to work and occasionally out to grab a bite to eat, I don’t get to dress up much. And when I do I never take a picture. So had to think about what I had that I could share. When going though my picture I saw that I had two of one of may favorite blazers. Everyone that knows me knows I never leave my house without a jacket, sweater, or scarf. So with that being said “what I wore” and actually got a picture of is me in one of my fav blazers from the UK French Connection from Sears :-)… The picture on the left is me behind the sceens at BET's Rip the Runway and the picture to the right is me on my birthday!!!
Music: Your least favorite song…
Soulja Boy Tell Em: Crank That...I abosulty postivily do not like that song. It maybe that when I first heard it I heard the orginally version before the radio version cam out and I was like what the F..K. I don't care that it's a catchy tune or that it has a dance to match. I repeat I absoulty postivly dislike this song with a passion.
When I first met you, I though you were perfect. You had everything I thought I wanted in one package. I eventually grew to love you and wanted you, to be with me, forever. As we grew up and grew apart I thought you may have been just for a season and I didn't want to accept you for only a reason. I tried to hold on to the thought of you. I didn't want to let you go. Everything that I need and wanted was in you except for love. You loved me but not the same way I loved you. I eventually decided to accept you as just a friend, but deep down I couldn't keep the way I felt bottled up inside. Sometimes it's hurts and causes me to potentially dwell on what we could have had. I find myself wanting to package you up and distribute you to my other suitors, knowing that, that's not healthy. I find it funny that I'm learning how to love from the rawest form, and I'm learning to get over a love that was never there. If I took you and broke you down and changed you around to the person I felt I needed I would only be hurting myself more. It's crazy how I call you when I hang up with someone else to fill that void that I some how need you to fill. I now consider you as one of my best friends, but I know it is in one of the most unhealthy forms of friendships there is. I need to let you go. This friendship has been a roll-a-coaster on my end, and I'm pretty sure it hasn't be easy for you either. This has been my most platonic friendship ever with someone that I have emotionally love. We've never kissed or even shared a lingering hug, but at some moments I've longed for you more than I longed for anyone else. I know in order for me to grow as a person I need to stop trying to keep you in my life for a lifetime and understand that you were JUST for a reason. I love you and wish you the best but I need to let you go. I'm working on me and this is a part of my process, and figureing out that I was putting a coma were God put a period was unheatly for me and you. Thanks for being my friend and eventually showing me were just a reason. I love you XOXOXO, be blessed.