So as some of you know I deleted my Facebook around two months ago, and not a week goes by that someone does not ask me "what happened" or "when are you coming back". So to shed I little light on the situation this is what I wrote a few minutes before I deleted. Does this have anything to do with why I deleted it, maybe! But this is what was going through my head. at the moment
I deserve better, and someday I will encounter people that will invest equally into my life as I do theirs. This life we will live can be taking from us at any moment, and I refuse to continue to seek acceptance from those that don't care to value who I am as a person. No more one sided friendships or relationship. I cant keep giving and allowing people to take without taking myself into consideration. Your opinions about me are just that opinions, remember everyone has them. I've lived my entire life seeking to please others and disregarding what I needed. I have this strange moral code that consist of this open heart in which some think they can do and say whatever they want because I will brush it off and not worry about it. Maybe it's the representative that I've made for myself and thats my fault. A person can only take so much before they break. Remember we're human and with that we have emotions and sometimes there uncontrollable.Sometimes we can't help how we feel and how we react. It's apart of our fight or flight response. Have you ever felt like your heart was being ripped apart? Well I have and I can't continue to allow anyone to put me in a uncontrollable emotional space, and yes I understand that this may not be the most positive post but it's the truth and it comes from apart of my heart that needs to be open and honest. We as people have to show sides of ourselves that's open and human. There is no such thing as a perfect person and I am no where near perfect. I hurt, and I feel pain. Please value the people that you have in your life no matter how small of a roll they may have because you never know the value that they have for you in their life. If there's a reason why you feel that person should not be in your life, tell them. Don't make up something to make them go away be open an honest. That respect alone will take you further in life, because the truth will come out eventually. I am the most important person in my life not anyone else, and I need to remember that. That's not meant to sound selfish, it's meant to remind my self that I am important also. And I can't continue to give others more value in my life than I do myself.
"When people show you who the are the first time, believe them." -Maya Angelou